Nicole Parker, PhD, LMFT professional counselor smiling and seated in white chair

Before I had my daughter, I had all the nursery items stocked, we had taken all the newborn classes at the hospital, we had a freezer full of meals ready to go.
I had done everything I could think of to prepare for bringing our baby home, yet I still had this general sense of “we have no idea what we are getting ourselves into”. People always say “It changes EVERYthing” and for us, there was a lot of truth to that statement! Especially in the beginning when the demands on us as new parents were so high. After the high of the first few days and sleepless nights, the dishes and the laundry piled up, the fatigue set in and everyday felt like an eternity yet the nights somehow seem even longer.

As a couple, you are probably struggling with feeling like you can’t do anything right in the eyes of your partner and you just want to know that you are good enough. You might feel so buried in resentments and disappointment that the tension in your house is almost tangible and it takes a huge effort to ask even simple questions in a civil tone. Or dealing with extended family, you might be feeling completely disrespected when they act as if they should have full access to your little one whether or not it actually works for you, or even your baby’s new schedule.

I understand these struggles, I have lived them too.

Nicole Parker, PhD

67% of new parents experience relationship distress

Here’s what you might be facing right now….

  • feeling overwhelmed by physical and the emotional toll of everything that’s changed
  • the sleep deprivation and resentment when one partner gets to sleep and the other does not
  • the isolation that usually follows after all the well-wishers go home
  • disconnected because of the lack of free time to just talk like you used to
  • burned out by not doing the simple self care actions we all take for granted such as taking a shower or going for a walk
  • feeling criticized when you try to take lead on baby care
  • getting your head bit off when you try to offer suggestions or advice
  • feeling totally “touched out” and wanting some space to breath
  • total lack of desire and discouraged that it may never come back
  • power struggles with well-intended family who don’t take “no” as an answer

How this works….

After a new baby all energy starts to pour into caring for a new baby and it leaves little to nothing left for the marriage. Over time, the stress takes its toll, patience and understanding become shorter, the rough tones and rough edges become sharper and loneliness starts to set in. It doesn’t have to stay like this. There is a path back to being a strong couple while also growing your family by learning:

  • How to ask for help from your partner
  • How to offer praise and encouragement to each other
  • How to be responsive to each other’s needs and requests
  • How to bounce back after a tough interaction together
  • How to dialogue about problems and come to a decision
  • How to make a plan together
  • How to keep your cool during difficult moments
  • How to talk about your intimacy without hurt feelings
  • How to make plans that work for your family’s needs, not other’s needs
  • How to craft new family routines and culture
  • How to stand up to pushy grandparents
  • How to stand up to each other in loving ways
    And much, much more!

Take a look at how other couples have
achieved this in just 90 days.

Here’s what we cover…

Phase One: Fix Your Coparenting 

  • Increase positivity and lessen negativity in your communication
  • Learn to talk about parenting together and feel good about your teamwork
  • Unify during stressful parenting moments
  • Listen to each other non-defensively
  • Problem solve family and parenting setbacks

Phase 2: Reconnect as a Couple

  • Talk openly about closeness and intimacy that works for this stage of family life
  • Manage conflicts as they come up
  • Work to support each other’s well being
  • Rebuild trust in your friendship with each other
  • Get back to planning your future while adapting to life changes

Phase 3: Adjust Your Family Boundaries

  • Think about your family needs first when making decisions instead of feeling overextended or resentful
  • Balance connectedness and separateness with extended family
  • Say “no” with assertiveness and kindness
  • Be each other’s support system through extended family struggles

Here’s what to do next

  • Click the link below to set up a free 45 minute video consultation call. Both partners need to be present for this.
  • Attend the consultation call so I can help you identify the three next things you can do immediately to start working together as a couple and stop doing it all alone.
  • If it feels like a good fit, we’ll schedule a session and get started.

Here are answers to some common questions that you might have at this point:

  • “How does this work?” This program is structured as a regular weekly video sessions with me, over a 90-day period.
  • “What’s covered?” There is so much I can cover with couples that this is a difficult question to answer. Generally speaking, we will focus on the relationship skills that are most important to foster early in the life of a couple building a family together; this includes managing differences of opinions in parenting, family organization, setting limits and holding boundaries, being assertive, offering and receiving emotional support, big picture planning, growing a family identity, working through conflicts with each other, maintaining affection and romance, standing up to pushy family members, and many more
  • “Who’s this for, and not for?” This is for couples who are in a committed monogamous relationship who have grown their family beyond yourselves, so you may have a newborn or you may have a three year old and still be struggling to work together. If you have to balance the identities of spouses AND coparents, this program will speak to your struggles.
  • “What if I’m still not sure?” Totally fine! That’s why we start with a free video consultation. Schedule the call, follow the steps, and together we will determine if this program is a good fit for your needs.

Do NOT suffer through your first years of parenting hating life together or wishing for the old days! You do not have to stay stuck. Take action by reaching out now.

Let me help you move through this challenging phase of life and you will come out of it a stronger team than you ever were before.